








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 220 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1752 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,574 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1264 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1200 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 995 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1115 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $413,835 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 40 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wampa | 67% | 15 |
| #2 | D3X | 60% | 15 |
| #3 | professional rat | 55% | 111 |
| #4 | Rythio | 53% | 62 |
| #5 | Me say | 50% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | D3X | 60% | 15 |
| #3 | professional rat | 55% | 111 |
| #4 | Rythio | 53% | 62 |
| #5 | Me say | 50% | 42 |
| #6 | Comfy | 33% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rythio | 12 | 0.0093 |
| #2 | professional rat | 6 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | Me say | 3 | 0.0037 |
| #4 | wampa | 1 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | Comfy | 1 | 0.0043 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | professional rat | 138 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #2 | Rythio | 88 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #3 | Me say | 81 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | wampa | 28 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | D3X | 25 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | professional rat | +3.12 | 88 | 52 |
| #2 | wtchワ | +0.95 | 84 | 63 |
| #3 | Rythio | +0.89 | 87 | 49 |
| #4 | wampa | +0.81 | 82 | 33 |
| #5 | D3X | +0.24 | 72 | 57 |





