








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 457 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 113 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 99 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3551 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,846 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3029 | 19% |
| Smokes | 4235 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 4555 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 4027 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $791,291 of utility $92 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 220 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | manly nord | 29 | 0.0061 |
| #2 | Toitum | 24 | 0.0067 |
| #3 | um | 13 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | Vollux | 8 | 0.0048 |
| #5 | Scourge of Sciurus | 6 | 0.0051 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | manly nord | 592 | 0.12 | 15 min |
| #2 | Toitum | 263 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #3 | purp scurp from up north | 117 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #4 | Vollux | 110 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | erigb | 109 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Toitum | +5.29 | 81 | 42 |
| #2 | Scourge of Sciurus | +5.27 | 76 | 41 |
| #3 | Vollux | +5.08 | 83 | 45 |
| #4 | loliver | +3.76 | 77 | 27 |
| #5 | luka | +0.80 | 56 | 64 |





