










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 11 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
178 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 575 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 132 | 23% |
| Smokes | 127 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 126 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 190 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $89,100 of utility $169 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Arcronus | 100% | 2 |
| #2 | StalkovicQAQ | 75% | 4 |
| #3 | Uncle Kuncle | 64% | 11 |
| #4 | xMoontee | 55% | 20 |
| #5 | JohnDeere | 50% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | xMoontee | 55% | 20 |
| #5 | JohnDeere | 50% | 14 |
| #6 | La Tuada | 38% | 13 |
| #7 | Robert Kurwica | 22% | 9 |
| #8 | włodar | 0% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | La Tuada | 2 | 0.0071 |
| #2 | xMoontee | 1 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | JohnDeere | 1 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | Robert Kurwica | 1 | 0.0050 |
| #5 | włodar | 1 | 0.0208 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Uncle Kuncle | 37 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #2 | La Tuada | 34 | 0.12 | 0 min |
| #3 | JohnDeere | 21 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #4 | włodar | 8 | 0.17 | 0 min |
| #5 | xMoontee | 7 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | włodar | +6.06 | 71 | 85 |
| #2 | xMoontee | +5.01 | 61 | 34 |
| #3 | StalkovicQAQ | +5.00 | 48 | 73 |
| #4 | Robert Kurwica | +0.55 | 78 | 48 |
| #5 | Uncle Kuncle | +0.28 | 56 | 80 |





