








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1862 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 484 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 162 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 104 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




278 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
13137 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,519 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2655 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2863 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2162 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 3839 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,405,310 of utility $80 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4103 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hr | 26 | 0.0127 |
| #2 | Thinking | 23 | 0.0219 |
| #3 | taetto | 19 | 0.0119 |
| #4 | arr | 16 | 0.0095 |
| #5 | μλ°μ¬ | 15 | 0.0199 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hr | 245 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #2 | ozicme:))) | 112 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #3 | arr | 104 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #4 | Ape with AK | 97 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | taetto | 82 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ozicme:))) | +9.39 | 98 | 60 |
| #2 | arr | +8.43 | 99 | 47 |
| #3 | URUHAez | +5.80 | 100 | 37 |
| #4 | μλ°μ¬ | +5.23 | 100 | 39 |
| #5 | .MAKI. | +3.00 | 89 | 33 |





