








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1247 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 470 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Premier | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




47 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7345 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 35,261 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10750 | 30% |
| Smokes | 7288 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 8304 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 8919 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,019,088 of utility $68 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 454 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | War Monke | 62% | 111 |
| #2 | Zoom | 60% | 272 |
| #3 | FusiioN | 57% | 390 |
| #4 | Cakir | 56% | 90 |
| #5 | dillybar$6.99 | 55% | 182 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Cakir | 56% | 90 |
| #5 | dillybar$6.99 | 55% | 182 |
| #6 | Tildoh | 55% | 186 |
| #7 | coastin | 55% | 143 |
| #8 | mjm15cs | 43% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tildoh | 23 | 0.0063 |
| #2 | FusiioN | 11 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | War Monke | 11 | 0.0045 |
| #4 | Zoom | 7 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | dillybar$6.99 | 6 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FusiioN | 1655 | 0.19 | 44 min |
| #2 | Zoom | 1023 | 0.17 | 27 min |
| #3 | coastin | 564 | 0.18 | 12 min |
| #4 | Tildoh | 479 | 0.13 | 11 min |
| #5 | War Monke | 400 | 0.16 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EDGE | +1.14 | 66 | 56 |
| #2 | coastin | +1.09 | 87 | 50 |
| #3 | Tildoh | +0.72 | 72 | 40 |
| #4 | Zoom | +0.43 | 58 | 65 |
| #5 | Cakir | +0.43 | 82 | 58 |





