








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 11 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Premier | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 5 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
595 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 908 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 167 | 18% |
| Smokes | 319 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 319 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 103 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $211,920 of utility $122 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 11 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Topsigang :) | 61% | 31 |
| #2 | H4NQU3 | 55% | 66 |
| #3 | M2NN1K | 51% | 69 |
| #4 | Balkan Jesus | 48% | 64 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Topsigang :) | 61% | 31 |
| #2 | H4NQU3 | 55% | 66 |
| #3 | M2NN1K | 51% | 69 |
| #4 | Balkan Jesus | 48% | 64 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | H4NQU3 | 3 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | M2NN1K | 2 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | Balkan Jesus | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | Topsigang :) | 1 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Topsigang :) | 77 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #2 | H4NQU3 | 65 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #3 | M2NN1K | 38 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #4 | Balkan Jesus | 30 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M2NN1K | +3.48 | 90 | 40 |
| #2 | Topsigang :) | +2.81 | 76 | 61 |
| #3 | Katumba Katumba | +0.50 | 39 | 31 |
| #4 | Balkan Jesus | -1.59 | 48 | 56 |
| #5 | H4NQU3 | -2.10 | 40 | 54 |





