










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 255 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 82 matches | ||
| Premier | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1221 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,344 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1085 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1142 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 811 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1306 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $617,401 of utility $201 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 206 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Khang | 88% | 8 |
| #2 | Benji | 75% | 8 |
| #3 | Maurice | 64% | 14 |
| #4 | [B]hu Tang | 61% | 28 |
| #5 | Emoman112 | 61% | 71 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | omega. | 60% | 62 |
| #7 | CrystalNugget | 54% | 79 |
| #8 | blimp grimpin | 50% | 16 |
| #9 | eric | 46% | 13 |
| #10 | Radica | 33% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eric | 2 | 0.0077 |
| #2 | [B]hu Tang | 1 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | Khang | 1 | 0.0057 |
| #4 | Radica | 1 | 0.0059 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Emoman112 | 334 | 0.22 | 8 min |
| #2 | omega. | 248 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #3 | CrystalNugget | 245 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #4 | [B]hu Tang | 89 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #5 | eric | 61 | 0.24 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Khang | +3.64 | 65 | 72 |
| #2 | Emoman112 | +2.67 | 91 | 58 |
| #3 | [B]hu Tang | +2.60 | 84 | 56 |
| #4 | Benji | +1.69 | 82 | 59 |
| #5 | blimp grimpin | +1.62 | 76 | 62 |





