








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 639 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 212 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 140 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 114 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4827 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,008 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3796 | 29% |
| Smokes | 3042 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3567 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2603 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,837,763 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 155 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mort | 68% | 40 |
| #2 | coach | 66% | 47 |
| #3 | duWap | 60% | 35 |
| #4 | wgns | 55% | 60 |
| #5 | cotovelo | 51% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tha chubbsta | 32 | 0.0208 |
| #2 | !Flop | 17 | 0.0068 |
| #3 | denial off the galaxy gas | 16 | 0.0073 |
| #4 | Ghostie-Kun | 15 | 0.0107 |
| #5 | AL unfb | 14 | 0.0075 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | !Flop | 428 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #2 | stickytip42 | 331 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #3 | denial off the galaxy gas | 237 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #4 | coach | 214 | 0.22 | 6 min |
| #5 | course | 196 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mort | +3.65 | 92 | 64 |
| #2 | course | +3.01 | 75 | 54 |
| #3 | cotovelo | +2.71 | 71 | 63 |
| #4 | endieZ | +2.57 | 52 | 49 |
| #5 | Manpoints69 | +2.40 | 50 | 53 |





