








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 5 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 66 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
474 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,987 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 706 | 24% |
| Smokes | 866 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 832 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 583 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $99,866 of utility $61 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Noxe | 71% | 7 |
| #2 | SpaceShorts | 60% | 15 |
| #3 | Xedge™ | 50% | 66 |
| #4 | JimmyPotato'_' | 47% | 77 |
| #5 | Jimmy Cap Jr | 45% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Xedge™ | 50% | 66 |
| #4 | JimmyPotato'_' | 47% | 77 |
| #5 | Jimmy Cap Jr | 45% | 20 |
| #6 | JIMMY196cm20cm60kg | 41% | 71 |
| #7 | j4nni | 27% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JimmyPotato'_' | 7 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | Xedge™ | 5 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | JIMMY196cm20cm60kg | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | Jimmy Cap Jr | 1 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | SpaceShorts | 1 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JIMMY196cm20cm60kg | 173 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #2 | JimmyPotato'_' | 167 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #3 | Xedge™ | 157 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #4 | Jimmy Cap Jr | 84 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #5 | j4nni | 25 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JimmyPotato'_' | +2.57 | 63 | 68 |
| #2 | Xedge™ | +2.04 | 88 | 66 |
| #3 | SpaceShorts | +1.82 | 58 | 69 |
| #4 | Jimmy Cap Jr | +1.60 | 64 | 71 |
| #5 | JIMMY196cm20cm60kg | +0.81 | 42 | 66 |





