








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 683 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 179 matches | ||
| Faceit | 37 matches | ||
| Esplay | 16 matches | 1,965 | |
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3966 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,622 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4272 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2944 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 3294 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 4112 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $753,216 of utility $106 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 71 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Den evige Bond | 23 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | Balla Allan | 18 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | iMonkey | 13 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | KvackiS | 11 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | FlyingPantz^ | 3 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iMonkey | 924 | 0.22 | 27 min |
| #2 | FlyingPantz^ | 588 | 0.14 | 16 min |
| #3 | KvackiS | 564 | 0.14 | 15 min |
| #4 | Balla Allan | 513 | 0.13 | 12 min |
| #5 | Den evige Bond | 457 | 0.08 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KvackiS | +2.24 | 82 | 79 |
| #2 | Dwarf | +1.94 | 81 | 73 |
| #3 | FlyingPantz^ | +1.01 | 63 | 70 |
| #4 | iMonkey | -0.14 | 49 | 72 |
| #5 | Balla Allan | -0.55 | 68 | 56 |





