








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 383 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 194 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 90 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5364 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,528 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4946 | 34% |
| Smokes | 4592 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1883 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 3107 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,344,300 of utility $128 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 297 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joshua | 65% | 34 |
| #2 | shred | 63% | 131 |
| #3 | Verti | 60% | 30 |
| #4 | Kratos | 55% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joshua | 65% | 34 |
| #2 | shred | 63% | 131 |
| #3 | Verti | 60% | 30 |
| #4 | Kratos | 55% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kratos | 3 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | shred | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | Joshua | 2 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | Verti | 2 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shred | 580 | 0.22 | 14 min |
| #2 | Joshua | 89 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #3 | Kratos | 89 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | Verti | 32 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shred | +3.84 | 90 | 68 |
| #2 | Joshua | +3.32 | 91 | 72 |
| #3 | froNex | +2.35 | 78 | 56 |
| #4 | Verti | +0.47 | 82 | 50 |
| #5 | Kratos | -3.64 | 48 | 67 |





