








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 545 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 384 matches | ||
| Faceit | 297 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 87 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7145 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 29,734 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3837 | 13% |
| Smokes | 8858 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 9326 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 7713 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,098,888 of utility $197 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 364 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cat In Shoes | 67% | 61 |
| #2 | N1KK3 | 60% | 195 |
| #3 | Bruun4800 | 58% | 60 |
| #4 | St0rmb0rn™ | 56% | 55 |
| #5 | Domimola | 55% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Barney 'bait for it' Stinson (or | 7 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | TheSorcery | 6 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | N1KK3 | 5 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | Klets | 5 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | _Sparkje | 5 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N1KK3 | 824 | 0.19 | 20 min |
| #2 | Klets | 752 | 0.20 | 16 min |
| #3 | Barney 'bait for it' Stinson (or | 719 | 0.14 | 16 min |
| #4 | Haydnsmovingcastle | 668 | 0.26 | 17 min |
| #5 | _Sparkje | 548 | 0.18 | 19 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hetrix | +3.17 | 80 | 61 |
| #2 | N1KK3 | +2.84 | 68 | 72 |
| #3 | _Sparkje | +1.56 | 85 | 84 |
| #4 | Haydnsmovingcastle | +0.82 | 85 | 64 |
| #5 | NYANELIT3 | +0.73 | 64 | 78 |





