








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 50 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 124 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1335 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,856 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2043 | 30% |
| Smokes | 2188 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 893 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 1732 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $582,236 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 79 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | twitch.tv/demon | 61% | 51 |
| #2 | The Magician | 58% | 64 |
| #3 | poo | 46% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | twitch.tv/demon | 61% | 51 |
| #2 | The Magician | 58% | 64 |
| #3 | poo | 46% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | The Magician | 4 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | twitch.tv/demon | 4 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | poo | 3 | 0.0039 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | The Magician | 192 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #2 | twitch.tv/demon | 106 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | poo | 88 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | twitch.tv/demon | +2.65 | 79 | 45 |
| #2 | poo | +0.67 | 77 | 62 |
| #3 | The Magician | +0.06 | 70 | 67 |
| #4 | ✪ HardTrance | -1.46 | 45 | 65 |





