








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 525 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 109 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5024 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,089 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1953 | 21% |
| Smokes | 2861 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1948 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2327 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,069,339 of utility $254 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 75 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FugTheMug | 26 | 0.0050 |
| #2 | Nick | 10 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | Cupofauqua | 8 | 0.0078 |
| #4 | twas | 7 | 0.0041 |
| #5 | Novaa | 3 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FugTheMug | 855 | 0.16 | 24 min |
| #2 | Adept | 268 | 0.22 | 6 min |
| #3 | twas | 249 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #4 | Nick | 234 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #5 | nyo | 121 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .barns | +3.00 | 85 | 54 |
| #2 | twas | +2.89 | 86 | 65 |
| #3 | baconatorfan98 | +2.34 | 84 | 59 |
| #4 | FugTheMug | +2.19 | 83 | 66 |
| #5 | nyo | +1.27 | 77 | 69 |





