








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
257 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,465 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 392 | 27% |
| Smokes | 355 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 363 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 355 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $63,042 of utility $83 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 15 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TRIX | 67% | 6 |
| #2 | JOEJOE 8< | 62% | 13 |
| #3 | Sællettudjus | 56% | 16 |
| #4 | Hjaul | 56% | 9 |
| #5 | KR Bum King_Tútti | 55% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Gotti | 50% | 2 |
| #10 | Auddddd | 50% | 6 |
| #11 | ste | 48% | 27 |
| #12 | Mökkur | 44% | 9 |
| #13 | wlzNkj$ is rws | 33% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sællettudjus | 56 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #2 | ste | 49 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #3 | KR Bum King_Tútti | 45 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | JOEJOE 8< | 28 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | wlzNkj$ is rws | 21 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JOEJOE 8< | +1.89 | 85 | 68 |
| #2 | wlzNkj$ is rws | +1.77 | 60 | 78 |
| #3 | Gotti | +1.54 | 56 | 62 |
| #4 | Mökkur | +1.25 | 68 | 76 |
| #5 | Sællettudjus | +1.11 | 52 | 70 |





