








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 36 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 219 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 36 matches | ||
| Faceit | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Renown | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4967 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,709 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5039 | 23% |
| Smokes | 6230 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 4450 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 5990 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $831,089 of utility $80 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hõcus | 60% | 272 |
| #2 | PIPASTAR | 59% | 110 |
| #3 | fins | 57% | 294 |
| #4 | bnv | 56% | 27 |
| #5 | fatboy noa:/ | 48% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | PIPASTAR | 59% | 110 |
| #3 | fins | 57% | 294 |
| #4 | bnv | 56% | 27 |
| #5 | fatboy noa:/ | 48% | 27 |
| #6 | S0lid^ | 47% | 73 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fins | 6 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | hõcus | 6 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | S0lid^ | 4 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | PIPASTAR | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | bnv | 2 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fins | 804 | 0.14 | 23 min |
| #2 | hõcus | 720 | 0.13 | 19 min |
| #3 | S0lid^ | 290 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #4 | PIPASTAR | 210 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #5 | bnv | 45 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fins | +2.76 | 93 | 67 |
| #2 | hõcus | +2.14 | 86 | 64 |
| #3 | S0lid^ | +1.08 | 58 | 81 |
| #4 | skitt fiske🎣🎣🎣🎣 | -0.19 | 63 | 68 |
| #5 | bnv | -0.32 | 80 | 63 |





