








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 693 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 195 matches | ||
| Faceit | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5460 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,450 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4520 | 27% |
| Smokes | 4466 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3732 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3732 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,607,708 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 641 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fncy | 69% | 61 |
| #2 | NozeyGoblin | 65% | 111 |
| #3 | LOW TRUST FACTOR LARRY | 65% | 54 |
| #4 | reVo | 64% | 122 |
| #5 | predat0r | 62% | 193 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | predat0r | 8 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | flatts | 8 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | Cakes | 8 | 0.0063 |
| #4 | reVo | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | NozeyGoblin | 2 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | predat0r | 543 | 0.14 | 12 min |
| #2 | NozeyGoblin | 422 | 0.18 | 9 min |
| #3 | Cakes | 345 | 0.27 | 10 min |
| #4 | dare | 268 | 0.22 | 6 min |
| #5 | reVo | 210 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fncy | +3.71 | 86 | 58 |
| #2 | Jeffery_z | +2.37 | 77 | 69 |
| #3 | Andrew Anjaroo | +1.77 | 83 | 66 |
| #4 | predat0r | +1.70 | 81 | 59 |
| #5 | dare | +1.69 | 70 | 68 |





