








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 796 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 556 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 68 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5689 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,770 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3703 | 16% |
| Smokes | 4956 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 7577 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 6534 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,188,802 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 262 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | blexen | 59% | 93 |
| #2 | hetrix | 53% | 171 |
| #3 | 3dfx♿ | 51% | 451 |
| #4 | Cipro_ | 49% | 212 |
| #5 | xTaito21 | 43% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | blexen | 59% | 93 |
| #2 | hetrix | 53% | 171 |
| #3 | 3dfx♿ | 51% | 451 |
| #4 | Cipro_ | 49% | 212 |
| #5 | xTaito21 | 43% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 3dfx♿ | 16 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | Cipro_ | 11 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | hetrix | 6 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | blexen | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | xTaito21 | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 3dfx♿ | 1060 | 0.11 | 24 min |
| #2 | hetrix | 680 | 0.20 | 18 min |
| #3 | xTaito21 | 347 | 0.23 | 8 min |
| #4 | Cipro_ | 296 | 0.07 | 8 min |
| #5 | blexen | 220 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hetrix | +2.30 | 74 | 65 |
| #2 | blexen | +1.25 | 84 | 61 |
| #3 | 3dfx♿ | +1.12 | 76 | 60 |
| #4 | xTaito21 | -0.72 | 71 | 63 |
| #5 | Cipro_ | -0.77 | 65 | 64 |





