








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 518 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 314 matches | ||
| Premier | 268 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6561 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,131 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9339 | 36% |
| Smokes | 7189 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 4702 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 4901 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,401,617 of utility $171 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 477 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hatty | 53% | 36 |
| #2 | ChelsBells | 52% | 62 |
| #3 | RGood | 49% | 396 |
| #4 | glizzyqueen | 47% | 182 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hatty | 53% | 36 |
| #2 | ChelsBells | 52% | 62 |
| #3 | RGood | 49% | 396 |
| #4 | glizzyqueen | 47% | 182 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RGood | 13 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | glizzyqueen | 3 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RGood | 1125 | 0.13 | 30 min |
| #2 | glizzyqueen | 715 | 0.18 | 15 min |
| #3 | ChelsBells | 237 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #4 | Hatty | 96 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ChelsBells | +1.00 | 77 | 64 |
| #2 | Hatty | +0.81 | 76 | 72 |
| #3 | RGood | +0.79 | 69 | 70 |
| #4 | guy hanukah | +0.03 | 66 | 68 |
| #5 | glizzyqueen | -2.06 | 55 | 58 |





