








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 26 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
380 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,274 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 470 | 37% |
| Smokes | 284 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 247 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 273 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $140,408 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 32 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Killer Crab | 76% | 17 |
| #2 | Alkotten | 61% | 33 |
| #3 | Ricky | 60% | 5 |
| #4 | Kotten | 59% | 22 |
| #5 | L1meXX | 52% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Kotten | 59% | 22 |
| #5 | L1meXX | 52% | 27 |
| #6 | Bengan 👶🏿 | 50% | 6 |
| #7 | Danix | 42% | 12 |
| #8 | Phjolix | 0% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alkotten | 1 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | Kotten | 1 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Killer Crab | 1 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | Phjolix | 1 | 0.0161 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alkotten | 107 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #2 | L1meXX | 85 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #3 | Danix | 55 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| #4 | Bengan 👶🏿 | 31 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| #5 | Kotten | 26 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bengan 👶🏿 | +5.05 | 73 | 83 |
| #2 | Ricky | +1.48 | 75 | 64 |
| #3 | L1meXX | +1.45 | 57 | 62 |
| #4 | Killer Crab | +0.29 | 56 | 66 |
| #5 | Danix | -0.13 | 56 | 78 |





