








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 206 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 128 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1586 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,754 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2205 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2273 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1747 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1529 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $487,348 of utility $135 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 505 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s0c | 92% | 13 |
| #2 | HKN | 75% | 20 |
| #3 | Postaly0 | 71% | 45 |
| #4 | Tommyth | 64% | 39 |
| #5 | arakondia | 63% | 76 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Karlsenn | 59% | 73 |
| #8 | ā¢JB | 58% | 120 |
| #9 | VolHa_ | 58% | 45 |
| #10 | Rednas | 54% | 70 |
| #11 | The StewmakeR | 50% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ā¢JB | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #2 | arakondia | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | Karlsenn | 2 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | Postaly0 | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Tommyth | 2 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ā¢JB | 536 | 0.20 | 15 min |
| #2 | Karlsenn | 334 | 0.22 | 8 min |
| #3 | Rednas | 295 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| #4 | arakondia | 238 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #5 | Postaly0 | 188 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Karlsenn | +3.07 | 54 | 72 |
| #2 | HKN | +2.27 | 86 | 72 |
| #3 | Rednas | +2.03 | 84 | 69 |
| #4 | Postaly0 | +0.99 | 57 | 77 |
| #5 | jeenyuhs28 | +0.90 | 51 | 65 |





