








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 190 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 196 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2028 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,031 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1985 | 22% |
| Smokes | 2580 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2240 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2226 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $945,909 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 21 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | Fyxx- | 35% | 48 |
| #12 | Grobi | 32% | 19 |
| #13 | D1rEkT | 32% | 19 |
| #14 | [GER]Leon | 28% | 29 |
| #15 | Dick Tator | 27% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Endlich Ruhe im Puff | 6 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | Dick Tator | 3 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | some1- | 2 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | .Kellerwal | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Fyxx- | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fyxx- | 153 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #2 | Seb.Lkn | 129 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #3 | .Kellerwal | 116 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #4 | some1- | 115 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #5 | Endlich Ruhe im Puff | 112 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Endlich Ruhe im Puff | +2.43 | 68 | 59 |
| #2 | D1rEkT | +1.90 | 77 | 57 |
| #3 | .Kellerwal | +1.53 | 66 | 69 |
| #4 | Seb.Lkn | +0.86 | 70 | 63 |
| #5 | Fyxx- | +0.55 | 75 | 66 |





