








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 461 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 382 matches | ||
| Faceit | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 47 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3906 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,732 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3424 | 22% |
| Smokes | 4321 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3775 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 4212 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,172,877 of utility $118 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 704 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Birty | 58% | 38 |
| #2 | Robot1c | 54% | 229 |
| #3 | Lewdawg_ | 52% | 275 |
| #4 | ThrillUrLife | 51% | 135 |
| #5 | Mike Ermantraut | 50% | 195 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lewdawg_ | 35 | 0.0061 |
| #2 | Mike Ermantraut | 21 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | ✪razz kickback.com | 15 | 0.0104 |
| #4 | Robot1c | 13 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | General Aladean | 13 | 0.0048 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lewdawg_ | 976 | 0.17 | 27 min |
| #2 | Mike Ermantraut | 794 | 0.19 | 19 min |
| #3 | Robot1c | 618 | 0.13 | 18 min |
| #4 | ThrillUrLife | 601 | 0.21 | 15 min |
| #5 | ✪razz kickback.com | 328 | 0.23 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lewdawg_ | +1.97 | 86 | 60 |
| #2 | caws | +1.87 | 82 | 57 |
| #3 | Robot1c | +1.61 | 78 | 58 |
| #4 | ThrillUrLife | +0.58 | 69 | 66 |
| #5 | ✪razz kickback.com | +0.32 | 79 | 66 |





