








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 689 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 142 matches | ||
| Faceit | 142 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3831 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,347 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4569 | 30% |
| Smokes | 4141 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2844 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 3793 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $891,800 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 307 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Swivel Sweeper MAX | 56% | 27 |
| #2 | Kurre | 54% | 239 |
| #3 | nimble | 53% | 276 |
| #4 | Masa | 51% | 150 |
| #5 | Spuffy | 50% | 210 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Spuffy | 50% | 210 |
| #6 | Wuppa | 49% | 215 |
| #7 | KioskNiko | 48% | 69 |
| #8 | Perhosexspertti | 45% | 56 |
| #9 | Tsikkenlord | 44% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nimble | 12 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | Spuffy | 9 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Kurre | 6 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | Wuppa | 6 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Perhosexspertti | 4 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nimble | 1655 | 0.28 | 51 min |
| #2 | Spuffy | 1031 | 0.23 | 28 min |
| #3 | Wuppa | 955 | 0.21 | 24 min |
| #4 | Kurre | 735 | 0.14 | 17 min |
| #5 | Masa | 655 | 0.20 | 20 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spuffy | +1.64 | 84 | 68 |
| #2 | Nänhäri | +1.55 | 79 | 76 |
| #3 | Wuppa | +0.60 | 56 | 68 |
| #4 | nimble | -0.08 | 53 | 79 |
| #5 | KioskNiko | -0.21 | 52 | 65 |





