








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 201 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 46 matches | ||
| Premier | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1736 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,847 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1225 | 21% |
| Smokes | 1809 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1480 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1333 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $666,550 of utility $179 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 19 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bal1le | 73% | 22 |
| #2 | FatimaKlappstuhlTV | 73% | 51 |
| #3 | PP | 71% | 34 |
| #4 | fARS DRENG ツ | 63% | 52 |
| #5 | 𝕷𝖚𝖈𝖎𝖋𝖊𝖗 | 62% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Stev998 | 60% | 132 |
| #8 | Kaiser | 53% | 15 |
| #9 | Riekepigen | 49% | 55 |
| #10 | Gull4ch | 48% | 27 |
| #11 | FROYYY | 40% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stev998 | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | Nørglobal | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #3 | Riekepigen | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | fARS DRENG ツ | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | Kaiser | 1 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stev998 | 237 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #2 | FatimaKlappstuhlTV | 212 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| #3 | fARS DRENG ツ | 106 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #4 | Nørglobal | 95 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #5 | Gull4ch | 80 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DjBanana | +3.09 | 72 | 70 |
| #2 | PP | +2.23 | 67 | 56 |
| #3 | FatimaKlappstuhlTV | +1.93 | 69 | 75 |
| #4 | Bal1le | +1.64 | 58 | 49 |
| #5 | fARS DRENG ツ | +1.46 | 71 | 74 |





