










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1392 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 376 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 133 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 54 matches | ||
| Faceit | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




65 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10431 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 30,480 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6829 | 22% |
| Smokes | 9167 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 6496 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 7988 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,512,234 of utility $187 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 855 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☺♀SMILEY♀☻ | 65% | 162 |
| #2 | MysticalWitch 💙 | 58% | 55 |
| #3 | K1NGA | 56% | 85 |
| #4 | Krabby Patty | 56% | 259 |
| #5 | Rachi | 53% | 94 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Rachi | 53% | 94 |
| #6 | Lunar | 51% | 503 |
| #7 | inferno | 50% | 88 |
| #8 | snarkyalyx | 50% | 140 |
| #9 | Corpzi | 48% | 97 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Corpzi | 27 | 0.0132 |
| #2 | Lunar | 16 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Krabby Patty | 14 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | snarkyalyx | 12 | 0.0041 |
| #5 | inferno | 5 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lunar | 749 | 0.07 | 17 min |
| #2 | snarkyalyx | 362 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #3 | ☺♀SMILEY♀☻ | 291 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #4 | Rachi | 281 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #5 | Krabby Patty | 210 | 0.04 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⦮ Kelsey ⦯ | +2.52 | 65 | 59 |
| #2 | Corpzi | +1.40 | 68 | 58 |
| #3 | ☺♀SMILEY♀☻ | +1.21 | 57 | 57 |
| #4 | Krabby Patty | +0.62 | 56 | 64 |
| #5 | Rachi | +0.02 | 69 | 64 |





