








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 222 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
599 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,885 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 807 | 43% |
| Smokes | 416 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 500 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 162 | 9% |
Our logs show you have wasted $265,448 of utility $205 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 39 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | dionysus | 48% | 40 |
| #8 | MIGI | 40% | 5 |
| #9 | adam sanALEER | 38% | 16 |
| #10 | (GER)ntlemen MR.CRAZYFRAG99 | 33% | 24 |
| #11 | Please dont shoot | 25% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | snedvriden | 4 | 0.0054 |
| #2 | krid$$$$ | 4 | 0.0171 |
| #3 | dionysus | 1 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | adam sanALEER | 1 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | MIGI | 1 | 0.0096 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dionysus | 190 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| #2 | snedvriden | 171 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| #3 | (GER)ntlemen MR.CRAZYFRAG99 | 42 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | p | 40 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #5 | adam sanALEER | 33 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | baplo | +4.64 | 74 | 76 |
| #2 | dionysus | +2.61 | 80 | 63 |
| #3 | p | +2.28 | 88 | 62 |
| #4 | krid$$$$ | +0.44 | 69 | 63 |
| #5 | MIGI | -0.57 | 58 | 62 |





