










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 198 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 5 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
263 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 874 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 160 | 18% |
| Smokes | 206 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 306 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 202 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $185,621 of utility $256 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 183 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | krid$$$$ | 100% | 3 |
| #2 | baplo | 50% | 2 |
| #3 | adam sanALEER | 43% | 21 |
| #4 | snedvriden | 38% | 13 |
| #5 | dionysus | 37% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | snedvriden | 38% | 13 |
| #5 | dionysus | 37% | 19 |
| #6 | Please dont shoot | 33% | 9 |
| #7 | hag1 | 33% | 24 |
| #8 | p | 20% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hag1 | 3 | 0.0057 |
| #2 | snedvriden | 2 | 0.0072 |
| #3 | adam sanALEER | 1 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dionysus | 116 | 0.28 | 3 min |
| #2 | snedvriden | 76 | 0.27 | 2 min |
| #3 | hag1 | 64 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | adam sanALEER | 50 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | Please dont shoot | 28 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | baplo | +2.99 | 62 | 72 |
| #2 | dionysus | +2.04 | 76 | 69 |
| #3 | snedvriden | +1.47 | 60 | 68 |
| #4 | krid$$$$ | +1.24 | 60 | 61 |
| #5 | p | +0.06 | 89 | 55 |





