








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 332 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 177 matches | ||
| Premier | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2250 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,988 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2854 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2693 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1640 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1801 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $639,346 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 248 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KrapS | 82% | 11 |
| #2 | psychopyro | 57% | 14 |
| #3 | xx>Bird<xx | 57% | 14 |
| #4 | DaBetes | 54% | 13 |
| #5 | Aurora | 50% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | xx>Bird<xx | 57% | 14 |
| #4 | DaBetes | 54% | 13 |
| #5 | Aurora | 50% | 38 |
| #6 | stuartlittle553 | 47% | 15 |
| #7 | rand | 44% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | psychopyro | 1 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rand | 218 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| #2 | Aurora | 140 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #3 | xx>Bird<xx | 45 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #4 | psychopyro | 37 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | DaBetes | 35 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DaBetes | +2.15 | 79 | 66 |
| #2 | KrapS | +1.41 | 65 | 65 |
| #3 | psychopyro | +0.95 | 78 | 43 |
| #4 | DangerCat | LFT | +0.34 | 66 | 66 |
| #5 | stuartlittle553 | -0.05 | 47 | 60 |





