








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 479 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 374 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 50 matches | ||
| Faceit | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




152 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5684 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,387 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3630 | 22% |
| Smokes | 4670 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 4631 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 3456 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $516,314 of utility $35 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 999 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pepsi | 58% | 103 |
| #2 | !Flop | 49% | 250 |
| #3 | Saga | 46% | 46 |
| #4 | Faker | 45% | 261 |
| #5 | shayo | 43% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Faker | 123 | 0.0233 |
| #2 | !Flop | 58 | 0.0115 |
| #3 | shayo | 27 | 0.0279 |
| #4 | Pepsi | 20 | 0.0107 |
| #5 | endieZ | 15 | 0.0182 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | !Flop | 1041 | 0.21 | 22 min |
| #2 | Faker | 712 | 0.13 | 14 min |
| #3 | Pepsi | 392 | 0.21 | 8 min |
| #4 | shayo | 149 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #5 | Saga | 111 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pepsi | +4.09 | 92 | 59 |
| #2 | Saga | +2.16 | 84 | 50 |
| #3 | 기사 Klshi | +1.12 | 80 | 35 |
| #4 | !Flop | +1.08 | 80 | 55 |
| #5 | Faker | +1.05 | 66 | 50 |





