








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 327 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 86 matches | ||
| Faceit | 78 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2255 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,637 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4293 | 31% |
| Smokes | 4122 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3925 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1297 | 10% |
Our logs show you have wasted $448,715 of utility $65 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 89 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | grandeiljano ♿ | 67% | 33 |
| #2 | Klebermeister | 63% | 32 |
| #3 | Goerkel | 62% | 37 |
| #4 | MAYOR_23 | 55% | 74 |
| #5 | qolambo | 54% | 179 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | megamasi | 52% | 21 |
| #9 | TaranTimo | 52% | 233 |
| #10 | Balutschi | 49% | 125 |
| #11 | Mathmos85 | 49% | 41 |
| #12 | Potti | 47% | 76 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Juicy_L | 10 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | Balutschi | 7 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | qolambo | 6 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | salkiN | 3 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | TaranTimo | 2 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | qolambo | 369 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #2 | TaranTimo | 235 | 0.05 | 6 min |
| #3 | MAYOR_23 | 211 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #4 | Juicy_L | 180 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #5 | salkiN | 90 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | qolambo | +1.62 | 65 | 54 |
| #2 | Juicy_L | +1.47 | 87 | 58 |
| #3 | RehMitWarnweste | +1.06 | 43 | 69 |
| #4 | salkiN | +1.03 | 82 | 55 |
| #5 | Potti | +0.97 | 81 | 56 |





