








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1281 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 934 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 109 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




55 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10259 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 31,375 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7328 | 23% |
| Smokes | 5926 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 11782 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 6339 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,907,722 of utility $204 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2283 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✟︎ street ✟ | 59% | 59 |
| #2 | CRIXUS | 57% | 118 |
| #3 | Suski | 56% | 140 |
| #4 | NitroDiesel | 55% | 221 |
| #5 | imilanfc | 54% | 326 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | CrAzYMoFo | 52% | 134 |
| #9 | - unknown • temptatioN* | 52% | 252 |
| #10 | k i l r | 51% | 117 |
| #11 | Butch | 51% | 147 |
| #12 | ✪ Carlito ✪ | 49% | 172 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | - unknown • temptatioN* | 9 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | imilanfc | 8 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | CrAzYMoFo | 8 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | Butch | 6 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | ✪ Carlito ✪ | 5 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Carlito ✪ | 701 | 0.19 | 19 min |
| #2 | - unknown • temptatioN* | 481 | 0.09 | 12 min |
| #3 | imilanfc | 454 | 0.06 | 12 min |
| #4 | NitroDiesel | 361 | 0.08 | 8 min |
| #5 | CRIXUS | 353 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | k i l r | +2.27 | 77 | 65 |
| #2 | CRIXUS | +1.79 | 78 | 73 |
| #3 | suM. | +1.21 | 79 | 70 |
| #4 | ✪ Carlito ✪ | +0.70 | 67 | 66 |
| #5 | Butch | +0.42 | 68 | 61 |





