








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 413 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 393 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 53 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5334 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,505 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4781 | 31% |
| Smokes | 4996 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 2613 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 3115 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,111,198 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 150 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stekare | 53% | 30 |
| #2 | SlaktarN | 50% | 66 |
| #3 | KrabbiN | 46% | 78 |
| #4 | Nais | 46% | 117 |
| #5 | Kraiss | 46% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | SlaktarN | 50% | 66 |
| #3 | KrabbiN | 46% | 78 |
| #4 | Nais | 46% | 117 |
| #5 | Kraiss | 46% | 59 |
| #6 | Prins | 35% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SlaktarN | 6 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | Stekare | 3 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | Prins | 3 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | Nais | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | Kraiss | 2 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SlaktarN | 140 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #2 | Nais | 135 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #3 | Kraiss | 106 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | KrabbiN | 105 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | Stekare | 86 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stekare | +2.40 | 74 | 64 |
| #2 | fank | +1.36 | 68 | 64 |
| #3 | SlaktarN | +0.02 | 61 | 64 |
| #4 | KrabbiN | -0.98 | 65 | 63 |
| #5 | Kraiss | -1.03 | 75 | 61 |





