








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 152 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1497 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,285 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1159 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1019 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 921 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1186 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $607,470 of utility $182 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 71 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪PrOsPeR | 55% | 64 |
| #2 | Sheldon_Sniper | 53% | 30 |
| #3 | Big_Melon | 45% | 42 |
| #4 | BigNeb | 44% | 115 |
| #5 | PG-PaT :D | 44% | 71 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | PG-PaT :D | 44% | 71 |
| #6 | Dadz | 41% | 37 |
| #7 | Merl1n | 38% | 8 |
| #8 | man cheetah | 38% | 8 |
| #9 | Gruffalo | 33% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BigNeb | 17 | 0.0071 |
| #2 | Dadz | 5 | 0.0066 |
| #3 | PG-PaT :D | 4 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | ✪PrOsPeR | 4 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | Big_Melon | 2 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BigNeb | 455 | 0.19 | 11 min |
| #2 | ✪PrOsPeR | 185 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #3 | PG-PaT :D | 168 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #4 | Big_Melon | 106 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | Sheldon_Sniper | 96 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sheldon_Sniper | +3.60 | 77 | 73 |
| #2 | Big_Melon | +1.78 | 53 | 52 |
| #3 | man cheetah | +1.61 | 54 | 62 |
| #4 | Hazzer | +1.40 | 60 | 60 |
| #5 | PG-PaT :D | -0.50 | 63 | 57 |





