








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 6 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1330 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,667 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1835 | 39% |
| Smokes | 450 | 10% |
| HE Grenades | 1421 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 961 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $399,378 of utility $106 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 123 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✖✖ KOREstronkest | 62% | 21 |
| #2 | Seagull | 56% | 45 |
| #3 | Brendenbak | 53% | 36 |
| #4 | [18e] Chriseh™ | 53% | 80 |
| #5 | Hey, Listen! | 50% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Brendenbak | 53% | 36 |
| #4 | [18e] Chriseh™ | 53% | 80 |
| #5 | Hey, Listen! | 50% | 18 |
| #6 | Sky | 45% | 49 |
| #7 | Bovine-simian | 38% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [18e] Chriseh™ | 17 | 0.0105 |
| #2 | Sky | 4 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | Brendenbak | 4 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | Hey, Listen! | 3 | 0.0075 |
| #5 | ✖✖ KOREstronkest | 1 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [18e] Chriseh™ | 451 | 0.28 | 13 min |
| #2 | Sky | 89 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #3 | Brendenbak | 78 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | Seagull | 47 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | ✖✖ KOREstronkest | 44 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [18e] Chriseh™ | +3.12 | 77 | 63 |
| #2 | ✖✖ KOREstronkest | +1.52 | 83 | 41 |
| #3 | Sky | +1.22 | 77 | 56 |
| #4 | Seagull | +0.24 | 77 | 51 |
| #5 | Brendenbak | -0.21 | 74 | 45 |





