








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 676 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 400 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 61 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4559 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,120 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4311 | 29% |
| Smokes | 3385 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 5042 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 2382 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,567,145 of utility $236 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 68 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Miggooo | 55% | 38 |
| #2 | Raimoust | 55% | 38 |
| #3 | pɘna666 | 53% | 53 |
| #4 | My little pony!<3 | 52% | 31 |
| #5 | Heinaee | 46% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DJ Lörtti Lyytikäinen | 12 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | Moksu | 5 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | Heinaee | 5 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | mauno | 5 | 0.0064 |
| #5 | teme | 4 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DJ Lörtti Lyytikäinen | 1205 | 0.24 | 37 min |
| #2 | Moksu | 1050 | 0.15 | 32 min |
| #3 | JANPPA1 | 679 | 0.23 | 22 min |
| #4 | teme | 419 | 0.19 | 11 min |
| #5 | molis | 396 | 0.24 | 13 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JANPPA1 | +4.28 | 92 | 80 |
| #2 | molis | +4.20 | 71 | 79 |
| #3 | pɘna666 | +3.99 | 87 | 79 |
| #4 | Miggooo | +2.07 | 77 | 64 |
| #5 | omar ruthless | +1.94 | 57 | 79 |





