








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 258 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 237 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3029 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,421 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4159 | 31% |
| Smokes | 3712 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2963 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2587 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $491,976 of utility $73 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 127 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | B0mb | 61% | 108 |
| #2 | Malako™ | 55% | 31 |
| #3 | CptSkipper' | 54% | 69 |
| #4 | BrixXBS | 54% | 28 |
| #5 | 세 다리 남자 3 7 3 | 52% | 209 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | B0mb | 61% | 108 |
| #2 | Malako™ | 55% | 31 |
| #3 | CptSkipper' | 54% | 69 |
| #4 | BrixXBS | 54% | 28 |
| #5 | 세 다리 남자 3 7 3 | 52% | 209 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 세 다리 남자 3 7 3 | 12 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | CptSkipper' | 5 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | B0mb | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | Malako™ | 2 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 세 다리 남자 3 7 3 | 186 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #2 | B0mb | 113 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #3 | Malako™ | 79 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | BrixXBS | 72 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | CptSkipper' | 41 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Larry Milker | +1.39 | 68 | 66 |
| #2 | 세 다리 남자 3 7 3 | +0.97 | 76 | 46 |
| #3 | CptSkipper' | +0.50 | 88 | 52 |
| #4 | B0mb | -0.09 | 74 | 54 |
| #5 | BrixXBS | -1.30 | 75 | 44 |





