








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 800 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 437 matches | ||
| Premier | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 35 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5297 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,055 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4743 | 19% |
| Smokes | 7522 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 6039 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 6751 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,739,730 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 249 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sinnex | 70% | 66 |
| #2 | druuuuuuuuuuu | 59% | 32 |
| #3 | Hobbes | 57% | 63 |
| #4 | MakoTaco | 55% | 299 |
| #5 | EVOLCGonTWITCH | 51% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | MakoTaco | 55% | 299 |
| #5 | EVOLCGonTWITCH | 51% | 39 |
| #6 | N1ck_3k | 48% | 40 |
| #7 | Browniee | 44% | 244 |
| #8 | Уточка | 43% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MakoTaco | 6 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | Browniee | 3 | 0.0006 |
| #3 | Hobbes | 2 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Уточка | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | druuuuuuuuuuu | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Browniee | 1590 | 0.31 | 46 min |
| #2 | MakoTaco | 1025 | 0.16 | 25 min |
| #3 | N1ck_3k | 277 | 0.32 | 6 min |
| #4 | Hobbes | 246 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #5 | sinnex | 178 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sinnex | +4.22 | 83 | 62 |
| #2 | N1ck_3k | +0.94 | 71 | 64 |
| #3 | Browniee | +0.76 | 72 | 72 |
| #4 | Hobbes | +0.33 | 73 | 59 |
| #5 | chuckyqueso | +0.04 | 69 | 67 |





