








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 10 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Premier | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
368 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,354 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 356 | 26% |
| Smokes | 424 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 317 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 257 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $178,983 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 37 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | ROOT | 43% | 7 |
| #8 | Bóbr | 43% | 14 |
| #9 | Alphad115 | 33% | 18 |
| #10 | Ser.Potato | 32% | 22 |
| #11 | WalterWide | 0% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Evilmoon | 4 | 0.0074 |
| #2 | cinnamon toaster | 2 | 0.0046 |
| #3 | scoutp250 | 1 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Evilmoon | 98 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #2 | cinnamon toaster | 71 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #3 | Alphad115 | 35 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | Bóbr | 26 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | sh9 | 23 | 0.09 | 0 min |





