








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 156 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 303 matches | ||
| Faceit | 187 matches | ||
| Wingman | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 106 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4605 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,240 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6036 | 23% |
| Smokes | 7851 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 6114 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 6239 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,142,911 of utility $91 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 32 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M3ll0w | 58% | 55 |
| #2 | Fr3ddy | 57% | 37 |
| #3 | cron!C | 56% | 32 |
| #4 | Param3d1c | 55% | 31 |
| #5 | schmandperle | 54% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Levitas | 19 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | syniix | 14 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | EMhighkz | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Param3d1c | 4 | 0.0062 |
| #5 | ✪ Stefelele ✖仲間 | 2 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | syniix | 520 | 0.11 | 15 min |
| #2 | Levitas | 267 | 0.05 | 7 min |
| #3 | EMhighkz | 208 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #4 | ✪ Stefelele ✖仲間 | 174 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #5 | TheRickos | 162 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | syniix | +3.32 | 92 | 74 |
| #2 | ✪ Stefelele ✖仲間 | +1.76 | 85 | 66 |
| #3 | schmandperle | +1.31 | 73 | 61 |
| #4 | M3ll0w | +1.29 | 73 | 62 |
| #5 | Param3d1c | +0.61 | 68 | 70 |





