








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 39 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 75 matches | ||
| Premier | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1649 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,754 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 885 | 19% |
| Smokes | 1138 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1331 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1400 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $428,044 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 11 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alx__ Ray Geld :) | 80% | 10 |
| #2 | Melio | 80% | 10 |
| #3 | -NKz. ♥L | 70% | 10 |
| #4 | iNs4n1tY | 69% | 13 |
| #5 | eNv | 64% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ^hNe | 278 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #2 | flPP | 177 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #3 | w1tcher | 112 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #4 | nopejes | 97 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | Damager | 77 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iNs4n1tY | +5.48 | 90 | 74 |
| #2 | Alx__ Ray Geld :) | +4.78 | 94 | 74 |
| #3 | w1tcher | +2.59 | 84 | 58 |
| #4 | Dmonkz | RubiN | +2.05 | 95 | 67 |
| #5 | Major | +1.45 | 73 | 65 |





