








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 131 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 113 matches | ||
| Faceit | 23 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1696 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,547 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1080 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1516 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 1143 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 808 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $624,107 of utility $171 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 44 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bytons | 93% | 15 |
| #2 | Runeli | 86% | 14 |
| #3 | ToL | 74% | 23 |
| #4 | Eleh | 69% | 26 |
| #5 | zorro | 65% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | ToL | 74% | 23 |
| #4 | Eleh | 69% | 26 |
| #5 | zorro | 65% | 23 |
| #6 | Juudi | 65% | 17 |
| #7 | mmt =DD | 61% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bytons | 3 | 0.0091 |
| #2 | Eleh | 2 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | ToL | 1 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | zorro | 1 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eleh | 137 | 0.24 | 5 min |
| #2 | mmt =DD | 68 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #3 | Juudi | 46 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #4 | zorro | 32 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | ToL | 31 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mmt =DD | +2.12 | 77 | 70 |
| #2 | Jusaa | +1.20 | 75 | 56 |
| #3 | Bytons | +1.05 | 56 | 55 |
| #4 | ToL | +0.99 | 78 | 64 |
| #5 | Runeli | +0.21 | 72 | 66 |





