








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 458 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 73 matches | ||
| Premier | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1979 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,027 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2247 | 37% |
| Smokes | 1162 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 2312 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 306 | 5% |
Our logs show you have wasted $295,237 of utility $51 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 993 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Drip | 50% | 22 |
| #2 | DirtyBird8 | 46% | 140 |
| #3 | plimby! | 45% | 22 |
| #4 | TheSky'sTheLimit | 44% | 135 |
| #5 | Sheeps | 40% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pizza | 27 | 0.0138 |
| #2 | Castle | 13 | 0.0155 |
| #3 | HYSTERIA | 13 | 0.0257 |
| #4 | DirtyBird8 | 8 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | TheSky'sTheLimit | 7 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pizza | +4.12 | 58 | 63 |
| #2 | Castle | +3.97 | 67 | 68 |
| #3 | plimby! | +2.02 | 70 | 23 |
| #4 | Moogitar | +0.52 | 21 | 56 |
| #5 | Drip | -0.06 | 36 | 48 |





