








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 139 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Premier | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1474 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,682 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1334 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1866 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 1136 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1346 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $721,068 of utility $187 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 160 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eHEL #dudes | 7 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | Richard! | 2 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Thunder Thighs | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | Cawfee ♡ | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MattR | +3.95 | 89 | 62 |
| #2 | icedstev0 | +2.96 | 88 | 58 |
| #3 | eHEL #dudes | +2.44 | 61 | 60 |
| #4 | Cawfee ♡ | +0.63 | 58 | 55 |
| #5 | Cleaner | +0.20 | 32 | 67 |





