








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 215 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 149 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 138 matches | ||
| Premier | 96 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6162 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,998 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2337 | 17% |
| Smokes | 3657 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2412 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 5592 | 40% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,206,964 of utility $213 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 636 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | YaqTheNok | 51% | 47 |
| #2 | MattR | 48% | 206 |
| #3 | eHEL #dudes | 45% | 211 |
| #4 | Endless | 45% | 58 |
| #5 | Cleaner | 44% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MattR | 24 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | Endless | 14 | 0.0121 |
| #3 | icedstev0 | 11 | 0.0033 |
| #4 | eHEL #dudes | 9 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | YaqTheNok | 9 | 0.0104 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MattR | 612 | 0.15 | 19 min |
| #2 | icedstev0 | 510 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| #3 | Endless | 313 | 0.27 | 5 min |
| #4 | eHEL #dudes | 275 | 0.06 | 7 min |
| #5 | ☢F1sh☢ | 266 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MattR | +3.79 | 88 | 63 |
| #2 | icedstev0 | +3.72 | 84 | 58 |
| #3 | YaqTheNok | +1.95 | 71 | 67 |
| #4 | Endless | +1.56 | 91 | 37 |
| #5 | eHEL #dudes | +0.64 | 56 | 55 |





