








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1242 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 177 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5231 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,143 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 894 | 22% |
| Smokes | 605 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 1294 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 1350 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,321,242 of utility $192 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 421 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nil | 63% | 119 |
| #2 | Deathsmile | 60% | 144 |
| #3 | Top G | 60% | 57 |
| #4 | mtw231 | 58% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nil | 63% | 119 |
| #2 | Deathsmile | 60% | 144 |
| #3 | Top G | 60% | 57 |
| #4 | mtw231 | 58% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nil | 12 | 0.0050 |
| #2 | Deathsmile | 8 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | Top G | 3 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | mtw231 | 3 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nil | 327 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #2 | Deathsmile | 144 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #3 | Top G | 86 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | mtw231 | 51 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dado | +5.05 | 96 | 40 |
| #2 | nil | +1.29 | 82 | 65 |
| #3 | Deathsmile | +0.51 | 92 | 37 |
| #4 | mtw231 | -1.67 | 79 | 62 |
| #5 | Top G | -2.42 | 68 | 47 |





