








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 84 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 97 matches | ||
| Premier | 96 matches | ||
| Faceit | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1898 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,376 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1162 | 18% |
| Smokes | 2189 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 1533 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1492 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $980,773 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Beefcake | 52% | 99 |
| #2 | c0croach | 47% | 140 |
| #3 | demoniac | 46% | 26 |
| #4 | Adamoss | 45% | 242 |
| #5 | WaskkoCZ | 37% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Beefcake | 52% | 99 |
| #2 | c0croach | 47% | 140 |
| #3 | demoniac | 46% | 26 |
| #4 | Adamoss | 45% | 242 |
| #5 | WaskkoCZ | 37% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | c0croach | 3 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | Adamoss | 2 | 0.0005 |
| #3 | Beefcake | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | WaskkoCZ | 1 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | demoniac | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Adamoss | 486 | 0.11 | 12 min |
| #2 | c0croach | 278 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #3 | Beefcake | 90 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #4 | demoniac | 60 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #5 | WaskkoCZ | 4 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | demoniac | +2.21 | 50 | 58 |
| #2 | Beefcake | +1.47 | 78 | 46 |
| #3 | Adamoss | +0.12 | 51 | 52 |
| #4 | c0croach | -0.09 | 54 | 60 |
| #5 | wez | -1.28 | 46 | 45 |





