








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 528 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 217 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4237 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,121 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1134 | 19% |
| Smokes | 1189 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 2405 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 1393 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $963,629 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 19 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mac Poulet 74 | 63% | 46 |
| #2 | Kenny'S | 57% | 53 |
| #3 | Мdz' | 53% | 92 |
| #4 | MeatSpix | 52% | 42 |
| #5 | Azu(Bazz) | 50% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kenny'S | 285 | 0.26 | 7 min |
| #2 | MeatSpix | 213 | 0.24 | 6 min |
| #3 | Мdz' | 198 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | Mac Poulet 74 | 125 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #5 | Azu(Bazz) | 100 | 0.23 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MeatSpix | +4.28 | 75 | 70 |
| #2 | Kenny'S | +3.94 | 58 | 67 |
| #3 | NT2J | +3.01 | 78 | 47 |
| #4 | Mac Poulet 74 | +2.91 | 79 | 70 |
| #5 | Мdz' | -1.93 | 54 | 61 |





