








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 183 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 109 matches | ||
| Faceit | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2196 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,154 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 990 | 19% |
| Smokes | 689 | 13% |
| HE Grenades | 2286 | 44% |
| Molotovs | 1189 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $921,372 of utility $185 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 154 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MurkScribe | 65% | 48 |
| #2 | A | 61% | 18 |
| #3 | latent | 57% | 106 |
| #4 | yari | 56% | 50 |
| #5 | Na's Last hope | 42% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | A | 61% | 18 |
| #3 | latent | 57% | 106 |
| #4 | yari | 56% | 50 |
| #5 | Na's Last hope | 42% | 31 |
| #6 | Rip-Roarin' Rick | 37% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | latent | 6 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | Na's Last hope | 5 | 0.0082 |
| #3 | MurkScribe | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | latent | 731 | 0.36 | 18 min |
| #2 | yari | 281 | 0.28 | 7 min |
| #3 | MurkScribe | 204 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| #4 | Rip-Roarin' Rick | 48 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | A | 46 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | A | +4.80 | 79 | 58 |
| #2 | latent | +1.65 | 68 | 73 |
| #3 | yari | -0.04 | 66 | 73 |
| #4 | Na's Last hope | -0.62 | 53 | 15 |
| #5 | fyg | -0.98 | 56 | 45 |





