








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 245 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 104 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1199 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,036 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1221 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1409 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1222 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1184 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $339,214 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | InfiniT | 57% | 7 |
| #2 | Fow-T | 56% | 9 |
| #3 | Hampel Waldwicht | 55% | 11 |
| #4 | SpitzhackenJoe | 54% | 24 |
| #5 | -->sändmäff<-- | 43% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sneaky1337 | +1.09 | 48 | 76 |
| #2 | InfiniT | +0.32 | 67 | 69 |
| #3 | SpitzhackenJoe | +0.27 | 65 | 77 |
| #4 | chr1s | -0.57 | 64 | 72 |
| #5 | Fow-T | -1.24 | 62 | 74 |





